ZACHARY TYLER BROWN 

July 28, 1995 - August 17, 2006

Thank you all for visting Zach's memorial site.  It is such a blessing to be able to do this in memory & honor of my wonderful son.  The above picture is my wonderful, beautiful son.  Please take time to look at all pictures, graphics, poems, sayings etc.  Please feel free to say some words & light a candle in memory & honor of  Zachary.  Again thank you all who come & remember my son, me & my family.  God Bless you all!!!!!!!!!!!!

Memorial cross Chris made for Zach...it is placed at the site of his passing !!!!!!!  Then was taken down and burned by the forest department in the month of October 09.  I got a hold of one of our local news stations and they did a story on it.  The local news paper also did a story on it.  It is no longer at the site where my son passed.  I am still and always will be very upset and hurt over what they did, but I will always have pictures of it and memories of my wonderful hubby making it for me to remember my love bug with.  Thank you honey.



Always your mommy !!!!!

Mommy & Zach taking a nap together....you loved taking naps & you loved sleeping in my bed I miss that so much baby !!!!

This is my cute sweet son trying to get into the bathroom...I went in there & of course when we are parents we can't go to the bathroom without our children.  I guess they think we can't do it by our selves.  He was such a mama's boy & I miss that so much.  I love you son & miss you so much.  I would give anything to have you bug me in the bathroom, but I know you are happy up in heaven.  I will be with you one day forever.  Love Mommy!!!

Happy New Year 2008 baby boy.  I love you & miss you so very much.  I know you are having a wonderful New Year in Heaven & we will be together soon.  Keep watch over me always son.  I love you

Right here in my heart & on my mind is where you will always be foever & always !!!! love you so much baby !!!



This memorial website was created in the memory of our loved one, Zachary Brown who was born in Oregon on July 28, 1995 and passed away on August 17, 2006 at the age of 11. We will remember him forever


My wonderful son was very loving and caring and was always willing to help and give his big hugs out. He loved baseball and reading and love to ride his bike and play with his little cars. He loved the holidays and his favorite was Christmas. He knew what it meant though, he knew it was about Jesus and his birth and not all about the gifts. Whenever we went to the grocery store and he saw an older person in a motor cart he would help them put their groceiers up on the belt and help them out to their car. I would not even tell him to do this he would do it on his own. Always wanting to give to others. I miss my son so much and love him so much and I know he is in heaven and I will see him again real soon.



I AM SO SAD YOU ARE NOT HERE WITH ME BUT I KNOW WE WILL MEET AGAIN IN HEAVEN & BE TOGETHER FOREVER

Blue is saying hi Zach & giving you a big puppy hug & kiss...he misses you also

Zach's football team

Mommy's football team

Chris's football team



Mommy's baseball team


Zach's & Chris's baseball team


Always sending you lots of kisses my sweet boy I love you & miss you so much!!! I miss your kisses!!

My sweet baby boy born on July 28, 1995 weighting in at 8lbs 6oz 21 1/2 inches long delivered by Dr. Dan Tomlinson at Rogue Valley Medcial Center in Medford Oregon at 6:50 am by C-Section.  You came into the world crying and peeing on the doc. 

"My Little Love Bug" always willing to give out lots of hugs and love...I love you & miss you my bug!!!






I miss you so much son and always sending you lots of hugs also.  Love your mommy!!!!

Zach just being poutie....isn't he cute with the little lip what a little prince !!!!!

I want to thank Hope Christian Church & the wonderful family I have there.  Pastor Aaron & his wife Lisa for all the help they have given me.  I want to thank my family.  My parents for being here for me always.  There are so many people that were there for me when it first happened that I thank.  I can't remember everyone's name but you know who you are.  I want to thank God my Lord & Savior because without him I would not be able to make it through each & everyday without my son.  Thank you all so very much for being here for me always.

IF TEARS COULD BUILD A STAIRWAY & MEMORIES A LANE, I'D WALK RIGHT UP TO HEAVEN & BRING YOU HOME AGAIN.



I know how much you loved to keep things & you had a little round can you had some coins in & I still have it with all the coins in it.  It is on your shelf at home sweet baby boy.  I will always keep it & treasure it!!!

As we light 3 candle wicks in honor of you, we light one for our grief, one for our courage, & one for our memories & the love we have for you.  This candle represents our grief.  The pain of losing you is intense.  It reminds us of the depth of our love for you.  This candle represents our courage - to confront our sorrow, to comfort each other, to learn to live our lives without you.  This candle is in your memory - the times we laughed, the times we cried, the times we were angry with each other, the silly things you did, the caring, the love & joy you gave us.  This candle is the light of love.  As we travel our life long journey of grief without you we cherish the special place in our hearts that will always be reserved for you.  We thank you for the gift your living has brought to each of us.  Your light will continue to shie bright in our hearts forever.

Jesus died on the cross to forgive us of our sins.....I am so thankful you learned that baby boy...now you are in heaven with Jesus forever !!






Noahs Ark...I know how much you loved this story!!! God bless all the animals

pooh saying good night Zach !!!

"Now I lay me down to sleep I pray my Lord my Soul to keep, if I die before I wake I pray my Lord my Soul to take."  I know you loved saying this before bed everynight!!!


One of your favorite things to do Tic Tac Dough...you loved to play this with Claudine in church & she misses you so much sweetie!!!!

You are my little water dog...you love the water & could never get you away from it once you were in it!!!









Zach's month




Chris's month




Mommy's month



You were also thankful for everything you had & I am very thankful I had you for my son for 11 wonderful years & for all eternity!!!!

I will miss you so much during the Holidays, it is a very hard time for me baby, many hugs & kisses to you from me for the Holidays !!!!  Merry Christmas to you son !!


I remember taking you to the mall when you were little & letting you sit on Santas lap & tell him what you wanted for Christmas, the most important thing you remembered was it was about Jesus & not what you got.  I am so thankful & blessed you remembered that year after year !!!!!!!



Christmas time your favorite time of the year...but you knew it was about Jesus & not all about getting gifts....you knew it was better to give then receive!!!!I am very proud of you son & proud to be your mommy & have you for a son!!

Zach helping out a little friend wrap Christmas presents.  Always a big helper.  I am so very proud of him.  I love you son & miss you so much !!!

A Christmas Prayer

Dear Father, on this special day in your presence we've come to pray, thanking you for your guiding hand and your strength that we might stand.  Another year has come and gone and though the days and nights were long you've kept us each so we would be an even stronger family.  And when our lips could speak no words you understood and still you heard.  You guided us thru never-ending nights until your glory would shine so bright.  We still don't understand the why's but trust in you ; as you're all wise.  Each day that passes brings us near that day you'll banish all our tears.  Let us celebrate this Christmas day sharing joy and laughter in this place and for our loved ones now resting with you we'll cherish their memories the whole year thru.  We thank you God for everything and let us not forget your sacrifice and love for us is the greatest gift.

Zach's Grandma at Christmas time showing off her PJ's she got from Santa.  Grandma was one of Zach's favorite people.  They were like peas & carrots !!! Grandma sure misses you son !!!

Zach's Pop-Pop...thats what he called him.  Pop-Pop misses you so much & is so very proud of you.  The only Grandson between both of them.


   


My little love bug angel boy !!!

Mommy, Chris, Grandma, Pop-Pop & Me (Zach) my family.  Mommy & Chris, Grandma & Pop-Pop here on earth & Me (Zach) in heaven with Jesus, watching over my family always.  We will all be together forever one day soon.  My family misses me & loves me so much & I love my family & miss them so much!!!!

I remember when you use to be outside playing & you would bring me in weed flowers & say these are for you mommy, I miss that so much my son, I miss all your home made gifts you use to make for me, there the best & I still have them all my sweet kind boy !!!!

Lots of tears have feel for you my baby boy & many more will fall in the days, weeks, months & years to come because I don't have you here with me physicaly but you are always in my heart, in my soul & on my mind....I love you so much


My heart broken with out you here with me my sweet son !!!

My sweet baby boy showing off.   What a heart breaker!!!

How I miss those kisses & hugs !!!!





I always remember telling you how much I love you & for you to never forget it & you said "I know mommy"



My little son bird....you loved to sing & sing in the childrens church...they miss you so much baby & I know you are singing heavenly tune

Zach after taking a bath & ready for bed.  You loved taking baths, one of your favorite things to do.  I always loved how you smelled when you were done, nice and clean & yummy !!!!! I miss that so much my son !!!!

You have a very special soul my son !!!







Zachary's sign



Chris's sign



Mommy's sign





My prayer is that you will be there at Heavens gate to take me in when it is my time....I will see you then My Little Love Bug forever & always love you mommy !!!!!

You loved to pray...I remember you saying your prayers at bed time & wanting to pray all the time at church.....everyone there misses you & you praying....so much me the most I love you son !!!!!!

Shared Loss

We know the loss of a child; we know this pain so well, we have this all in common; though no one can ever tell.  Our children we have never forgotten, not even for a day, their love engraved in our hearts, forever will always stay.  Time has slowly healed our hearts, but the memory never fades, for some it may have been a year, a month or just a few days, it doesn't matter how long it's been the feelings all the same, we held our children in our arms and chosen each their names.  We said hello and goodbye and to God's arms they lay, we cried and prayed, pleaded to God don't take our children away we left our children each with a kiss and hope our love they feel.  This loss has happened, all so fast we can't believe its real.  Our friends and family do not understand why it hurts so much because it is our loss our children our grief even if its rough.  God has anointed us, with the spirit to heal our broken hearts, we must trust and follow him he has carried us from the start.  Today we will celebrate our childrens memory with honor, with love sent to Heaven from each... their Mother & Father

Very proud, thankful & blessed that I am your mommy & always will be....I am also very proud of you my son Love your Mommy always & forever !!!!

Just what you did everyday you lived, laughed & loved with all your heart & touched lots of lives with your spirit !!!



You are such a treasure so special to me always even though you are in Heaven !!!




For all the parents that have lost their children because of a drunk driver...PLEASE DON'T DRINK & DRIVE...my thoughts & prayers are always with you !!!!








Family always very important to you son...you loved Grandma & Pop-Pop so much & they both miss you so much !!!





Because he lives I can get through each day without you my son because I know we will be together forever one day !!!!!




You loved to read & we would always go to the Library & get lots of books & you would read some to me then I would read some to you I miss that so much son...you were getting so good at your reading & I loved to listen to you read I miss it so much !!!!!

Good-Bye Is A Hard Word

Good-bye is a hard word to say, to someone going to Heaven above.  Good-bye is even worse when said, to someone you dearly love.  But when it is your sweet child, a part of your body and your heart.  It's the worse thing for a parent.  A journey of being apart.

So much of your life now changing, through grief and a river of tears.  So many plans that now are gone, leaving such pain for the coming years.  Your life is now so divided, from what is now to the days before.  For you never thought you'd Good-bye, to your child whom you do adore.

You cling to your dear memories, of your times and their sweet smiles.  It's all you have left to see you through, a journey of years and miles.  In your dreams, they come to you, making your life once more so bright.  Then daytime comes and you awake, to a life where nothing seems right.

You long for your family and friends, to be with you like on that day.  To share pictures and their memories, for these gifts you dearly do pray.  They mean more than any gift they buy, or advise they prefer to share.  For advise they prefer to share.  For advise on this means nothing, unless you carry this burden I bear. 

Remember these words for the future.  For the parents who follow me.  Their pain is with them forever.  From it they will never be free.  Be kind and understanding, and don't tell them what they should do.  For saying Good-bye to your child, is a task no parent should go through.

My Scar

We have many scars you and I that tell stories of our past from injuries old and new.  Scraped knees as children, falls of bikes, perhaps even a surgery or two.

My newest and most visable scar is a red line running vertically up my left check.  Most people would hide it, cover it with makeup, it is not something they would want to keep.

But I in some strange way treasure this scar the mark has a different meaning for me.  It is an outward sign of a terrible wound a wound that the world can't see.

Some scars are deeper then we can see with our eyes hurts and trauma, pains from the past.  They have cut across our very hearts and changed who we are...changed the person we were in the past.

You can't see the scar I carry inside even though it is still gaping and red the healing process is painfully slow, how could it go faster? my son is dead.

The pain of my loss will never go completely away it will forever be a part of me now an image of grief etched upon my soul my cross to carry until we arrive in the streets of gold.



I Can Know

When my soul feels warm as sunshine, I can know that you are there.  It's not from an artifical heat source, or from out there in the air.

It's a consequential feeling, that means so much to me.  It comes from the love we share together, and it sets our spirit's free.

The triggers are so very many, that brings our love from the heart, as your memory runs through to my mind, it will know just when to start.

Even though you have passed from this life, and through deaths' doors you have gone so unfair, when my soul feels warm as sunshine, I can know that you are there.


TO REMEMBER YOU

Hold onto the memories, the grief knows they're true for whenever I need them to try to remember you.  I bring them to the surface, and try to make them last, for that is all I have of you, to link me with your past.  Death has only seperated us so, our bodies can not touch but our spirits are always connected, to our souls, our hearts and such.  And time for us is always, for the enternity that we will be, for we're linked together through love and the things you can not see.  I need enough thoughts inside to see my grief on through as I hold on to the memories...they're all I have of you.


MOMENTS OF BATTLE

Moments of battle, when my grief hits true.  Seconds of lifetimes, when I grieve for you.  Brings emotions so raw, with so little relief.  These moments of battle, that I fight in grief.  Oh why do I have, your circumstance of death?  Why was my life longer, while you had your last breath?  Wondering now, some years after you died, will I make it again, to feel good inside?  These questions of misery, are those that I own, from deaths that I've known.  My heart has emploded, there's no happiness left.  For the places of peace, where I feel so inept.  Oh moments of battle, whent his grief hits true.  Seconds of lifetimes, when I grieve for you.  Will my battles be shorter, with time will I heal?  As this battle rages on, its sadness now I feel.  My loved one is dead, my life re-arranged, it feels as though everything's changed.  Cry for your hope, grow it from heart, try to lift your head, to do your part.  Don't ever give up, or let insanity rule.  Use everything you got, not to be grief's fool.  Please learn all you can, while you're still here.  Fight for your hope, and use the force of fear.  Lend your heart now, to your Sister's and Brother's, please help yourself while reaching out to others.  I can only know what I'm taught to do.  In these moments of battle, when I grieve for you.

This is the plaque the school Zach went to dedicated to him.  The school mascote is the Road Runner.  I know how much you loved this school son....they all miss you so much baby !!!!

This is my pastor Aaron in the hat & his wife Lisa...and friends from the Church who helped get this all together.  I have a wonderful Church family....

This is a poster board the after school program Zach went to made for me.  Its a picture they took of some kids with some of there favorite books.  The flowers were also made by them.  I love it.  I am talking here in this picture about Zach.

Pop-Pop & Grandma miss you so much son.  I know how much you love them.  Grandma misses you coming up to her & giving her big hugs.  We all miss you so much baby.  Love you lots !!!

This is a picture taken of Zach & some kids at school showing off some of their favorite books.  Walter the Farting Dog is a very cute book & one of Zach's favorites.  The after school progam he was in made this picture into a poster board for me when we had the plaque dedication at the school.  I thank them all so much for what they did !!!!

THEY THINK I'M FINE & OVER IT

They think I'm fine & over it accepted that you died but I live life with all this pain & countless tears I've cried I am forced to live with endless pain that others can't accept they think I'm fine and over it or that I'll soon forget I want to scream from rooftops or silently just cry I never will be over it my God my child died! It makes no sense to argue my energy is low so when they think I'm over it I simply tell them no I've become what they have wanted a turtle in it's shell just keep my thoughts within myself and never ever tell I mask my life to others to myself as well for living every day on earth is surely more like hell Simply put I won't get over it not better...stronger...fine it is only that I've had no choice...to live this life of mine.